Human Design Generator

Human Design Generator

What if you got to be 58 years old
and then someone told you that you had a design...

That you came in with a design... a way to optimally move through your world.

And what if you realized that, all your life, you've worked against the design that this Human Design information says you were born to live?

That's where I am.

I've been a "doer" all my life, and under the assumption that I had to make things happen.

In this "human design" structure, a Generator waits.

Before I found this information, I NEVER WAITED.

It's been one of the most challenging paradigm-busting awarenesses I've ever experienced.

It feels like truth to my core. And yet, it's so challenging for me.

Never heard of Human Design?  Well, if you don't mind your world being turned upside down, you can learn a bit about it here and if you're really brave, get your free Human Design chart

#humandesign #HDgenerator
A Generator Waits...

How do you know when you're in the flow?

In the Now and In the Flow

by Neva J Howell

I've focused for many years on mindfulness.  In spite of that focus, I often find myself unmindful. I can't find my keys because I wasn't mindful when I threw them down. I don't remember all of a conversation because I went somewhere else in the middle. And the challenge to notice when I'm in the flow of my own life path and when I'm outside of the flow is still just that ... a challenge. Some days, I do better than others.

Just posted a podcast on the subject:  In the flow and in the now

#theflow #mindfulness 

Having a nightmare about having a nightmare

Dreams within Dreams ....
Suggested reading:  Medicine Dreams Diary

A friend of mine had a nightmare. In the nightmare, she was dreaming she was asleep, having a nightmare.  Now, that can just make my head hurt if  I let it.

What do you think a dream like that would mean, or could mean?

For me, it feels like her soul is showing her that the pain she is in right now, as heavy and dense as it might seem to every part of her being, as real as it might seem, is something she is waking up from.  Sometimes, when we wake up from ways we've been mistreating ourselves, it can still feel like we're in the dream.

Curious to know what others might think of this.

Shadrach Village Web Series Launches!

It's a magical place!

I launched a new webisode show called Shadrach Village.

It's about a group of people who leave mainstream work and world to bring their dreams back alive.  They walk out on comfort to live in an old warehouse with no electricity or running water, because they feel like they are suffering even more greatly by living lives that don't make sense anymore.

Princess Oleska is the self-proclaimed leader of the village and it is all made possible by the generous contribution of the warehouse space by The Flushings, of Flushing Plumbing.

So, if you feel like you might remember just a little of something magic ... some dream that you had to lay down for one reason or another ... maybe a trip to the village is just what you need!

Update 2017: The platform for the webseries was taken down in 2012. I miss it and hope another mass production tv platform will open up soon so Shadrach Village can continue.

Looking for Christian Books?

My sis often finds old and even rare collectible books for her online store, including some very interesting Christian books.

If you are looking for collectibles of all kinds, nice scarves and neckties, collectible caps and books, please check out Down South Sisters

Spiritual Purpose

Been thinking 'bout this lately.

Am I here to experience being me?

Or am I here to change me into something better?

I've always read that earth is a school and we're all here to learn and grow.  While learning and growing seems inevitable with experience, I have never felt that was exactly the goal.

This idea of coming back repeatedly to fix karma doesn't sit exactly right in my consciousness either.  Fix it in editing, I say.  No need to reshoot the entire film, but that's the actor talking.

I don't have answers.

I question what this whole earth experience is about though.

I do that a lot these days.

Virtual Reality , Really?

Beckinfield Beckons....

A while back, I joined what is called a Mass Participation TV Project, or MPTV for short.

It's a concept ... create a virtual town online.  Have actors create characters to populate the fictional town.  See what happens.

What happens is kinda awesome.  I joined because I'm an actor and love creating believable characters.  I didn't realize, at the onset, how deeply thus acting experience would impact me.

Turns out, virtual reality is not that much different than what we think of as the real world.

I've formed relationships, not as myself but as my fictional character, with other characters created from the minds of other actors.

It's bizarre.

It's surreal.

It's metaphysical at a fairly amazing level.

Loving it.

Come see Leda Jo Gupta in Beckinfield.  Bet you'll be hooked if you stay very long....

Leda Jo Gupta, resident spiritual advisor of Beckinfield, California.

More about Leda JO

Medicine Dream About Ex

Taking Responsibility for my part in a past relationship trauma

When my spiritual marriage of seven years ended, to say I was devastated would have been a vast understatement.  I was utterly and completely demolished.  In fact, it took another seven years for me to come back alive, or feel any true sense of moving on.

I went thru quite a few levels of clearing, forgiving, asking forgiveness, etc. during that seven years and the years since.  I felt I had dealt with it, finally.

However, I am finding out that these times we are in demand a whole new level of resolve and transformation of the illusions of our apparent past.


My dream:
I am in my old home with my partner.  I am telling him that I want to own my part in what happened with us.  I speak out what I felt to be my own judgements, resistance, negativity and non-progressive aspects of participation.

Although the dream ended on a note that let me know there was another facet of that experience that still held some accountability and balancing for me (and this is not karma I'm referring to, per se, it's a different experience for me ... in some way I don't feel comfortable articulating yet) so I expect there may be another dreamtime journey in store.

Normally, I'd ask myself what area of my life the dream was addressing, but this was such a straight-forward, soul-level astral journey that interpretation isn't even something I need to explore.  It was more than a dream.  I'm glad my dreamtime is transforming thru astral travel communication and look forward to more of same.

Medicine Dreams Diary

What now?

Recognizing the ending and beginning

There's a flux in my energy field, my vibrational resonance with the whole.

It is being caused by shift.  Something is ending, something else beginning.

At least, this is how it feels.

In my recent exploration of living beyond choice, the advice I AM would give me would be to be patient, in the vein of that old scripture that admonishes "wait, thou, upon the lord."

To be still.  To allow for the coming in of the optimal movement in the flow of my life, rather than looking for oars, and heaving ho toward some new space of being that I instigate from a personality-self level. 

For a Human Design Generator with an undefined mind, I have no shortage of things to think about doing but they're mostly other peoples thoughts.

Living Choicelessly

What does life look like without choices?

I suppose the exploration into choiceless living may have started way back when, back when I first read about the potential of a life without story or carlos castenadas books on the space between things.

I'm not sure how the path meandered ... just that it has brought me here.

Here, to this moment where I am typing this -- appears to be a choice.  Yes.  Still is a choice ... spurred by thinking google may index my other blog if I also post a reference to it here on this one.  Conscious, logical choice.  If I'm correct in my exploration toward living choicelessly though, this logical approach to getting something I want is not the best or most spiritually aligned way to create the desired result -- that desired link between google and my own content online.

It may work, because it's obeying well-established 3-d laws that a lot of people have supported for a long time.  Yes, it may work ... and ... I AM aware that it is work.  It is not the cosmic play vibration I'm wanting to create from in my life.

I AM observing myself still going thru levels of choice in my life that I AM aware are not stemming from that place beyond logical or analytical choice.

I'm at an empass of worlds; a crossroads of reality.