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The Dream:
I can't recall much at all but I'm in a mobile home with Clint Eastwood. He is telling me that we never got together because of timing. I wasn't sure what he meant but nodded yes.
Then, the trailer door came open and I saw the biggest dog I've ever seen. An impossible dog really, with oddly colored hair going from red to orange to brown.
The dog was vaguely frightening though it did nothing frightening. Clint came to the door and reached around me and closed it. Our arms were touching and hands. He kissed me and it was a deep, motionless connection.
Then, I asked what he meant by what he had said earlier.
He brusquely replied oh, that he had just meant we hadn't been friends because of timing, as if uncomfortable with the idea of romance with me.
My take on the dream so far:
Whenever I dream of celebrities, I have to ask what I feel about them, in general, not the characters they play (unless they show up in the dream as a character they have played, of course). I also must note that my interpretation also gets colored by my involvement in acting. Because I am a professional actress, Clint Eastwood represents a bit more to me than the non-actor, I assume.
So....I have always felt that Clint knew himself and his way of presenting himself to an exquisite degree and that's why he chose the roles he chose and why the worked so well for him. At the same time, they leave me unfulfilled because he's usually distant from himself in them. Hard to put into words....he gives a presentation of truth but he hides himself away behind it.
Because the dog was impossibly big, I realized that it held special significance, telling me that whatever it represented in my life was bigger than it should be. In my awareness, Dog medicine is about loyalty and service. I had to ask where I was being unloyal to myself and where I might not be noticing an opportunity to be of service as a spiritual being.
Update, July 10: Reading over this dream again, I am struck by my own intuition and the way I went down a well-established path of self-flagellation with it rather than seeing it true. My instincts were in the statement "whatever it represented was bigger than it should be". One of my biggest struggles has been needing to feel of service, and of value, all the time and never feeling I could just relax and be. Seeing this again after some time between the dream and me, I can see that the dog may have been telling me my concerns about being enough of service were bigger than they should be.
Clint had the feel of representing my male self in the dream, as opposed to any sense that his consciousness was actually there. I've had those types of dreams, where I felt the consciousness of the celebrity was with me, helping me, but this wasn't one of those.
Because Clint kissed me that deep, motionless way that usually means it is my male self connecting with me, and because he also helps me close the door against the vaguely threatening dog, I assume that my male self is not quite ready to deal with what the dog represents.
This also seems true because of his brusque change when asked what he had meant at the first of the dream.
Update, July 10: Even the fact that Clint "helps me close the door against the vaguely threatening dog" takes on new meaning now. Was I being told to ease up and let myself be ok?
So, I feel I've had an issue surface that will unfold in the future.
Also, one odd aside....the color of the dog reminded me of the Martha Stewart show I had watched the day before. On it, she was painting a lion's face on a cake and the colors she was using sort of matched the mane of the big dog in the dream but that's not the part of the show I remembered. I remembered earlier, when a man had come up holding a container that had toad frogs in it (I know that sounds like another weird dream but it was really on the show). He was on the show to educate people about the importance of protecting toads, which are different from frogs.
What bothered me about that segment is that he came in and started to talk and Martha made him stand there with that can in his hand for what seemed like 10 minutes while she made him listen to some track of thought she was in. It felt very awkward for him to just stand there. It felt controlling to me, the kind of nasty control that Martha Stewart was often accused of before her prison days.
So, if we look at Clint as my male self and the dog representing that aspect of Martha that I connected with when I looked at the dog in the dream, then here is my male and female in some sort of battle over awareness.
Very interesting dream.
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