Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Dreams about being in school

Finally. A Medicine Dream I remember. I was really beginning to wonder how long it was going to take me to get back into the swing of dreamtime work. I know one thing, I don't ever want to let it go that long again!

The Dream: I am in a school room, and have just been told I have an assignement to complete when the dream starts. The assignment is lying on the back of something, a couch I think and, when I pick it up, I realize it is to be completed that day! There is a man who is supposed to actually implement the plans I made for the assignment, which is some kind of event in a room I think of as an arena in the dream.

The man gets sidetracked, listening to the problems of another (female) student and just barely gets my assignment done on time.

When I begin to grade the assignment (it is to be self-graded. there was a form with gold stars, etc. and it asked questions about the assignment.) I become concerned.

One of the questions asked if the arena was prepared at least two days prior to the event date. I thought this was very unfair since I'd only been notified about the assignment that day.

I went to the teacher. The woman who was my teacher in the dream was very much like the only really good teacher I had in junior high school. She actually made math make some kind of small sense to me. That was in the 8th grade. So here was this teacher from 8th grade, talking to me about the trouble I was having grading the assignment.

She empathised with my concern and was tremendously supportive. She even told me that the superintendent had decided to waive all assignment requirements for the first four months of the year. That's when I realized I would have had to do three more if they had not been waived and would have been even further behind. Then, the teacher said she'd create a special folder for my assignments and keep them for me. She said it would be fun. That made me feel good. She showed me a glimpse of the next assignment and it seemed I felt it would be fun, just as she had said. But the dream ended with me feeling vaguely overwhelmed by the realization that another assignment was following close behind this one and that there would be one per month for the rest of the year.

My take on the dream so far: As I always do, I asked what area of my life this dream addressed, on waking and realizing I had dreamed. I also took time, lying there, to go over the dream again, to get it in my mind before rising. I got that the dream was about my very recent decision to launch back into healing and teaching. I have not been actively involved as a healer or speaker, beyond the occasional session or lecture, for several years.

My absence from active work was due to the terribly traumatic breakup of my seven year spiritual marriage. It hit me as hard as any single event in my adult life.

So, observing the dream from that perspective, that it addressed my decision to come forth into the world again as a healer and teacher, I began to understand a lot of the vague feelings of overwhelm I had been having since that decision.

My issues with men appeared with the man who was supposed to arrange the arena for me, per my instructions but who got sidetracked by the needs of another woman. In some ways, this parallels my true life experience. My spiritual husband got sidetracked by the needs of another woman, and his own needs, of course.

What the dream revealed to me is that, in my spiritual marriage, there had been some expectation on my part that the man, my partner, would bring into reality what I designed spiritually. This is warped, of course. I have to correct my thinking about men bringing into manifestation. That is a masculine trait - to do. To act is masculine. But each woman has a masculine side that can be just as capable at doing as the feminine side is at being. I have some balancing of my own male/female energies to do.

One of the most significant discoveries in this dream was the 4 month extension. It is now March, in the waking world - the third month. What this telling bit of info gave me was the reality that I'm expected to launch my return to the healing world in April, the fourth month. No more delays.

I wish I could recall what the assignment for April was about. That's the fourth month. That's what is coming next. Alas, I just recall that it looked like fun.

The dream ending with a feeling of overwhelm again was a message to stay in the moment. I went from feeling it "could be fun" to dreading the fact that there would be a new assignment to complete every month for the rest of the year. OK, got that loud and clear. Stay in the moment.

My choice of a teacher was telling too. I chose a model of support and good cheer. This particular teacher, looking back on my junor high years, was the most balanced teacher I had. I would trust her.

I know that the time period is also significant - 8th grade. What stands out for me about the 8th grade is deciding how short to wear skirts. This teacher wore them short. It was also a year that I escaped a paddling by telling a "little white lie".

Interesting memories emerged when I focused on that time in my life.

Lots to digest.

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