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The Dream: I am in a room with Dr. Phil.
I'm looking at a computer screen, where I see a lot of cd's that he has created. I suddenly realize I could ask him to energize one of them for me, while I'm there with him so I ask.
I turn back to the screen and pick one with a girl on it but somehow end up with a cd with a boy on the cover. I realize that's not the one I wanted and try to choose again.
The second cd has an actress on it, about my age, and another actress who appears to be the mother of the first actress.
I choose a third time, still trying to get the girl, and end up with a boy on the cover again.
My take on the dream so far:
When I have dreams with celebrities, unless they play a character from a film or tv show they've done, I always ask myself what I think of them as people. I think Dr. Phil is sometimes confrontive, macho and controlling. I also think he is judgmental where I feel there should be neutrality at times.......
The hard part is all the Dr. Phil I see in me. That hard, rather redneck edge. And instead of getting the cd with the little girl, I kept getting a boy, the masculine.
The second cd has special significance due to an experience I had years ago and also due to the fact that I am an actress in real life.
Years ago, in a guided meditation, I saw two aspects of myself, the woman and the crone, in a very vivid way. In some way, this cd reminded me of that experience.
It also reminded me of my relationship with my own mother and of course, of my acting, so it was loaded.
What I liked was that both the first woman and her "mother" were actors. I remember hearing something Bill Harris said on the Centerpointe tapes, which I use. It had to do with remembering that our experience on this earth was not who we truly are but just one role we are playing.
Bill compared it to acting on a stage. He said (and I'm paraphrasing) if a person on stage was playing Hamlet and thought it was real, it would be a horrible experience. The actor knows it's just a play and so he has a great time even though it's intense and emotions are real.
I think the second cd was reminding me that myself and my mother had agreement to be together here, to play out certain experiences, but that believing I was responsible for her life would be like the actor forgetting he was in a play. And believing that whatever happens here is some kind of tragedy, is like forgetting that our souls are eternal and this life is just a blip on the radar of our path.
Choosing Dr. Phil to "energize" my cd meant that I'm out of balance with the masculine. Either I don't have enough or I have too much. I think, looking at my own Dr. Phil tendencies of controlling, judgment and agression of expression, it may be the latter.
In any case, the dream points to balancing my male and female aspects and also, remembering the big picture of this existence more than the little picture in front of me.
Note: This dream is in stark contrast to one I had earlier, where I had a loving intimate male relationship but it may be pointing to the same issue.